At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming out of fear. With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky. The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.


Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.
The waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.

The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.

It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.
Lessons learn t from the story:

• I understood, I should not react in life.
• I should always respond.
• The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hands, to avoid cracks in relationship, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress or hurry.

- Dr. Moiz Hussain

Jealousy is comparison. And we have been taught to compare, we have been conditioned to compare, always compare. Somebody else has a better house, somebody else has more money, somebody else has a more charismatic personality. Compare, go on comparing yourself with everybody else you pass by, and great jealousy will be the outcome; it is the by-product of the conditioning for comparison.

If you drop comparing, jealousy disappears. Then you simply know you are you, and you are nobody else, and there is no need. It is good that you don’t compare yourself with trees, otherwise you will start feeling very jealous: why are you not green? And why has existence been so hard on you — and no flowers? It is better that you don’t compare with birds, with rivers, with mountains; otherwise you will suffer. You only compare with human beings, because you have been conditioned to compare only with human beings; you don’t compare with peacocks and with parrots. Otherwise, your jealousy would be more and more: you would be so burdened by jealousy that you would not be able to live at all.

Comparison is a very foolish attitude, because each person is unique and incomparable. Once this understanding settles in you, jealousy disappears. Each is unique and incomparable. You are just yourself: nobody has ever been like you, and nobody will ever be like you. And you need not be like anybody else, either.

Existence creates only originals; it does not believe in carbon copies.

- Dr. Moiz Hussain

Every Friday afternoon, after the Jumma prayers, the Imam and his eleven year old son would go out into their town and hand out "PATH TO PARADISE” and other Islamic literature.

This particular and fortunate Friday afternoon, as the time came for the Imam and his son to go to the streets with their booklets, it was very cold outside, as well as pouring rain.

The boy bundled up in his warmest and driest clothes and said, 'OK, dad, I'm ready!'

His dad asked, 'Ready for what' 'Dad, it's time we go out and distribute these Islamic books.'

Dad responds, 'Son, it's very cold outside and it's pouring rain.'

The boy gives his dad a surprised look, asking, 'But Dad, aren't people still going to hell, even though it's raining?'

Dad answers, 'Son, I am not going out in this weather.'

Despondently, the boy asks, 'Dad, can I go Please'

His father hesitated for a moment then said, 'Son, you can go. Here are the booklets. Be careful son.'

'Thanks, Dad!'

And with that, he was off and out into the rain. This eleven year old boy walked the streets of the town going door to door and handing everybody he met in the street a pamphlet or a booklet.

After two hours of walking in the rain, he was soaking, bone-chilled wet and down to his VERY LAST BOOKLET. He stopped on a corner and looked for someone to hand a booklet to, but the streets were totally deserted.

Then he turned toward the first home he saw and started up the sidewalk to the front door and rang the door bell. He rang the bell, but nobody answered.

He rang it again and again, but still no one answered. He waited but still no answer.

Finally, he turned to leave, but something stopped him.
 Again, he turned to the door and rang the bell and knocked loudly on the door with his fist. He waited, something holding him there on the front porch!

He rang again and this time the door slowly opened.

Standing in the doorway was a very sad-looking elderly lady. She softly asked, 'What can I do for you, son?' With radiant eyes and a smile that lit up her world, this little boy said, 'Ma'am, I'm sorry if I disturbed you, but I just want to tell you that ALLAH REALLY LOVES AND CARES FOR YOU and I came to give you my very last booklet which will tell you all about God, the real purpose of creation, and how to achieve His pleasure.'

With that, he handed her his last booklet and turned to leave.

She called to him as he departed. 'Thank you, son! And God Bless You!'

Next week on Friday afternoon after Jumma prayers, the Imam was giving some lectures. As he concludes the lectures, he asked, 'Does anybody have questions or want to say anything?'

Slowly, in the back row among the ladies, an elderly lady's voice was heard over the speaker. 
 'No one in this gathering knows me. I've never been here before.  You see, before last Friday I was not a Muslim, and thought I could be. My husband died few years ago, leaving me totally alone in this world... Last Friday, being a particularly cold and rainy day, I was contemplating suicide as I had no hope left.

So I took a rope and a chair and ascended the stairway into the attic of my home... I fastened the rope securely to a rafter in the roof then stood on the chair and fastened the other end of the rope around my neck. Standing on that chair, so lonely and broken-hearted I was about to leap off, when suddenly the loud ringing of my doorbell downstairs startled me. I thought, I'll wait a minute, and whoever it is will go away.

I waited and waited, but the ringing doorbell seemed to get louder and more insistent, and then the person ringing also started knocking loudly....

I thought to myself again, 'Who on earth could this be? Nobody ever rings my bell or comes to see me.' I loosened the rope from my neck and started for the front door, all the while the bell rang louder and louder.

When I opened the door and looked I could hardly believe my eyes, for there on my front porch was the most radiant and angelic little boy I had ever seen in my life. His SMILE, oh, I could never describe it to you! The words that came from his mouth caused my heart that had long been dead TO LEAP TO LIFE as he exclaimed with a cherub-like voice, 'Ma'am, I just came to tell you that ALLAH REALLY LOVES AND CARES FOR YOU!'



 Then he gave me this booklet, Path To Paradise that I now hold in my hand.

As the little angel disappeared back out into the cold and rain, I closed my door and read slowly every word of this book. Then I went up to my attic to get my rope and chair. I wouldn't need them any more.

You see? I am now a Happy Vicegerent of the One True God. Since the address of your congregation was stamped on the back of this booklet,  I have come here to personally say THANK YOU to God's little angel who came just in the nick of time and by so doing, spared my soul from an eternity in hell.'

There was not a dry eye in the mosque. The shouts of TAKBIR...ALLAH AKBAR... rented the air.

Imam-Dad descended from the pulpit to the front row where the little angel was seated....

He took his son in his arms and sobbed uncontrollably.

Probably no jama'at has had a more glorious moment, and probably this universe has never seen a father that was more filled with love and honor for his son... Except for One. This very one...!!!

 Take your time................but read it!!!

Since last night my young son has been unwell. When I got back from Work this evening I decided to take him to hospital despite my exhaustion.

There were many waiting; perhaps we will be delayed by more than an hour. I took my number and sat down in the waiting room. There were many faces, young and old, but all silent. Some brothers made use of the many booklets available in the waiting room.

Some of those waiting had their eyes closed, while others were looking around. Most were bored. Once in a while the long silence was broken by a nurse calling out a number. Happiness appears on the one whose turn it is, and he gets up quickly; then silence returns.

A young man grabbed my attention. He was reading a pocket-sized Qur`an continuously; not raising his head even once. At first I did not think much about him. However, after one hour of waiting my casual glances turned into a deep reflection about his lifestyle and how he utilizes his time. One hour of life wasted! Instead of making benefit of that hour, it was just a boring wait. Then the call for prayer was made. We went to prayer in the hospital's Masjid. I tried to pray close to the man who was reading the Qur'an earlier in the waiting room.

After the prayer I walked with him. I informed him of how impressed I was of him and how he tries to benefit from his time. He told me that most of our time is wasted without any benefit. These are days that go from our lives without being conscious of them or regretting their waste.. He said that he started carrying the pocket-sized Qur`an around when a friend encouraged him to make full use of his time. He told me that in the time other people waste he gets to read much more of the Qur`an than he gets to read either at home or in the masjid. Moreover, besides the reward of reading the Qur`an, this habit saves him from boredom and stress.


He added that he has now been waiting for one and a half hours. Then he asked, when will you find one and a half hours to read the Qur`an? I reflected; How much time do we waste? How many moments of our lives pass by, and yet we do not account for how they passed by? Indeed, how many months pass by and we do not read the Qur`an? I came to respect my companion, and I discovered that I am to stand for account and that time is not in my hand; so what am I waiting for?

My thoughts were interrupted by the nurse calling out my number; I went to the doctor. But I want to achieve something now. After I left the hospital I quickly went to the bookshop and bought a pocket-sized Qur`an. I decided to be mindful of how I spend the time. If this information is beneficial to you, then please do forward it to your friends and relatives.

Our Prophet (SAW) said:

'Whoever guides or directs to good, then he gets the same amount of blessing (reward) as the one who does it.'

The Prophet (SAW) also said:

'Pass on knowledge from me even if it is only one verse'

  Ensure that you understand the meanings. Please do not recite it like a parrot.

Agenda

•  Introduction to Intrapersonal Communication

• What does Intrapersonal Communication Mean?

• Communication With Self

• What is included in Intrapersonal Communication

• Different level of Communication Activity

• Benefits

• Suggestion

• Conclusion

 Introduction to Intrapersonal Communication

In order to successfully communicate with others you must first learn to communicate with yourself. Intrapersonal communication is the most basic level of communication. You must understand who you are & what you think about your self.

Intrapersonal communication is the foundation of Interpersonal communication. Therefore, it is necessary to understand how you communicate with yourself before you communicate with others.

 What does Intrapersonal Communication mean?

  The communication we have with ourselves the self talk that determines how we view the world and how we view ourselves is called Intrapersonal Communication.

Intrapersonal is to do with self. The dictionary gives the meaning of Intrapersonal is existing or occurring with in the individual self or mind.

        “There are three things extremely hard, steel, a diamond, and to know one’s self.”
            Benjamin Franklin

 Communication with Self or Self-Talk

Intrapersonal Communication is concerned with communicating with your own self. Day dreaming, thinking, imagining and problem solving fall under its purview.

Various feedback mechanisms of a human body such as hunger, pleasure and pain are also included in Intrapersonal communication.

Thinking over the Future

An example of Intrapersonal communication is thinking over the future.

        “A man who does not think for himself does not think at all”
        Oscar Wilde

What is included in Intrapersonal Communication?

Self Concept

Is the basis for intrapersonal communication, because it determines how a persona sees him and is oriented toward others. Self-concept also called self-awareness involves three factors:

1) Beliefs     2) Values     3) Attitudes

 It means that your level of knowledge of about yourself & how you feel about your self. Self-concept or self-awareness is not in born. It develops as we grow through our communication with others and from our environment.

• Real self: Your “core” self; who you really are.

• Perceived self: Who you see yourself to be.

• Ideal self: Who you want to be now or in the future?

• Social self: Who you are when you interact with others, individuals or in Social situations.

• Intellectual self: Who you are as a student and a learner; the part of you that acquires and uses knowledge.

• Emotional self: The part of you that processes feelings.

• Physical self: Who you are physically; including the concept of your own body, gracefulness and coordination, level of attractiveness, physical health and well being.

• Artistic self: The part of you that is creative or artistic.

• Self-Disclosure: Providing information to others that they would not learn if we did not tell them and Reciprocity we expect others to share similar information.

Building a Positive Self-Concept

• Can give you confidence you need to communicate effectively

• Must draw from your strengths

• Must know where you need to improve

• Set goals for change

Self-Disclosure

Once there lived two brothers who lost their parents at an early age. They worked together on their family farm. Some years later, the elder married and had a family with 2 children, while the other was still single. They worked hard together in the day and at the end of each day they shared their produce equally.

One day while the single brother was working in the fields, he thought to himself, ...“It’s not right that we share equally everything. I’m alone and my needs are simple. My brother has a big family. He needs much more.” With that in mind he took a sack full of grains and slowly went to his brothers barn and places the sack quietly. He did so every night.

Meanwhile, the married brother thought to himself, “It’s not right that we share everything equally. After all, I’m married and I have my wife and children to look after me in years to come. My brother has no family and no one can take care of his future. He really should have a bigger share.” So each night he took a bag of grain and put it into his brothers barn quietly.

This went on and both men were puzzled for years because their grain never dwindled.

Then one night, on the way to each others barn, the two brothers coincidentally met and they found out what was happening all these years! They dropped their bags, cried and embraced one another with tears of happiness.

Moral: Love for your brother what you love for yourself.

May ALLAH allow us to implement this beautiful quality in our lives and keep us away from jealousy. Aameen!